Therapy for People-Pleasing: How to Set Boundaries and Still Feel Loved

Do you constantly seek others' approval—even at the expense of your own needs? Does saying “no” fill you with guilt or fear of rejection? You’re not alone. People-pleasing is a deeply ingrained pattern for many, often rooted in early relationships or past trauma. But over time, it can lead to burnout, resentment, and a loss of your authentic self.

At Be Your Best Self & Thrive Counseling in St. Petersburg, FL, we help individuals uncover the root causes of people-pleasing, heal from codependency, and learn how to set healthy boundaries—without losing connection or love.

Key Takeaways

• Understand why people-pleasing develops and how it affects your self-worth.

• Learn how therapy helps you set boundaries while maintaining strong relationships.

• Explore holistic, trauma-informed approaches that support lasting change.

• Build the confidence to live more authentically—without fear of rejection.

What is People-Pleasing (and Why Does It Happen)?

People-pleasing is more than just being "nice"—it’s often a coping mechanism. You might have learned early in life that your needs were less important than keeping others happy. Over time, this becomes a pattern: you prioritize others, avoid conflict, and feel uneasy when asserting yourself.

Therapist Rochelle Young, M.A., specializes in helping people in St. Petersburg, FL who struggle with self-esteem, people-pleasing, and boundaries. She works with clients to explore these patterns and rebuild a healthier sense of self-worth.

Signs You Might Be a People-Pleaser

• You say “yes” even when you want to say “no.”

• You avoid conflict, even if it means sacrificing your needs.

• You feel responsible for how others feel.

• You feel resentful after giving too much.

• You struggle to ask for help or express your emotions.

People-pleasing may seem helpful on the surface, but it often leads to inner

exhaustion, resentment, and unhealthy relationship dynamics.

The Hidden Costs of People-Pleasing

When you consistently put others’ needs before your own, it chips away at your self-identity. You might begin to feel unseen or disconnected—even in close relationships.

This emotional dynamic often shows up in therapy as:

• Anxiety or burnout

• Perfectionism or guilt

• Difficulty trusting others

• Fear of abandonment

Learn more about perfectionism and self-worth and how it connects with people-pleasing patterns.

How Therapy Helps You Set Boundaries (And Still Be Loved)

Therapy can help you shift out of old patterns and create new, empowering ways of relating to others. Our therapists use approaches like:

• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to challenge core beliefs like “I must keep everyone happy to be loved.”

• Internal Family Systems (IFS) to work with parts of you that fear rejection or conflict.

• Somatic Therapy to build awareness in the body and regulate nervous system responses when setting boundaries.

Read our guide to IFS therapy to explore how these internal parts show up in your life.

Setting Healthy Boundaries: Where to Begin

Therapy teaches you how to:

• Identify your emotional and physical limits

• Use “I” statements to express needs without blame

• Tolerate the discomfort of pushback

• Rebuild your identity around values—not approval

Boundary setting isn’t about pushing others away—it’s about creating the conditions for safe, mutual connection.

People-Pleasing and Holistic Mental Health

At Be Your Best Self & Thrive Counseling, we use a holistic therapy approach to support clients from the inside out. That includes:

• Mind-body practices to soothe the nervous system

• Techniques to interrupt overgiving patterns

• Reconnecting with your own desires, values, and voice

Whether you're struggling in your personal relationships, your job, or your family dynamics, therapy can help you reclaim your energy and sense of self.

Get Support from a Therapist Who Understands

Rochelle Young | Counselor in St. Pete, FL

If you’re ready to stop people-pleasing and start showing up more fully in your life, we’re here to help. Rochelle Young, M.A. offers individual therapy in St. Petersburg, FL focused on self-esteem, boundaries, and healing from burnout.

You don’t have to keep saying “yes” to everyone else while saying “no” to yourself.

Schedule a free consultation today to explore if therapy with Rochelle is the right next step for you.